Get A Job. Sha Na Na Na!
Maybe you can tell me something. I recently interviewed for what I would call a glorified Denny's. I had FOUR interviews for a management position (is that normal?!?!?!), one that would probably pay me less than serving there. The main concern of this employer: my plugs and tattoos. Okay, I get it. But we're not selling stocks and bonds here...this is a hamburger joint. The crew wears t-shirts and jeans. I have two bachelors' degrees and over eight years of experience. I can wear long sleeves and flesh-toned plugs. In fact, no one even noticed my ears until some tiny "Juno the Caseworker" manager pointed it out between Virginia Slims. I'm sorry Juno, I know you hate me because I had to explain what the word "clandestine" meant to you. Holy shit.
However, is this what is important to employers? Should it be? I see EIGHTY PERCENT of people (mostly women) sitting in these cattle-call style, "group interviews" and all of them are wearing...jeans. Granted, most are presumably younger than I am, but some I know are in my age range and above. Is it ridiculous of me to be astounded by this phenomena? When I was in management, if someone even approached us to APPLY in jeans, we would kindly note that and turn them away. Something about the seriousness of wanting a job, so you look presentable...
Don't get me wrong. I do not go into interviews wearing a leather vest and leggings, with my hair completely spiked and huge gauges in my ears. I look like Mary Fucking Poppins. No one could ever guess I have A tattoo, let alone...I don't know how many anymore. No one notices my ears, unless they look with a magnifying glass. I would assume they would use said magnifying glass on my resume, but alas.
So today, just like every day, I applied to a couple jobs that I know I am WAY overqualified for, but assuredly I will not get. I also applied for jobs I have no idea how to do, also...won't get. People that have interviewed me have actually said, "You might want to leave your education off of your resume from now on." WHAT THE HELL??? I ain't too proud to beg either. I interviewed at Pick Up Stix...and they were "concerned" about my ears as well. "Hi, here's your fried wontons...Oh? My ears? I'm sorry you're suddenly going to leave without paying?!?!" NOT GOING TO HAPPEN.
I have applied at all "freak-friendly" environments, Target...etc. I live in the middle of urban sprawl central, so there's no cute art district or "fun shops" to work at. Even though this is Southern California, people are rigid as hell about appearance in the workplace. DAMN YOU PORTLAND. I can't wait to move...in the meantime, I can't even get Starbucks to call me back. I am this close to jogging down to the Jack in the Box on the corner and throwing myself onto the counter. No, maybe not for a job this time...but maybe just for some french toast sticks.