Tuesday, May 21, 2013

A Stranger Bird for This Strange Bird


"don't you know I'm loco?"
 



dress: c/o Stranger Bird Vintage shoes: Target belt: Old Navy plugs: Body Jewelry Source glasses: Zenni Optical
I miss you my bloggies!  I'm sorry I've been away for awhile, I have had tons of personal stuff going on: from work, to the blog, to the usual family drama and of course, I've been tanning a lot.  Just kidding.  Here are some great shots of a dress I was gifted by my dearest Jenny, owner and operator of The Stranger Bird Vintage, and I am also happy to say, new and dear friend of mine.  Please check out her shop, and this blog, where I will be showcasing many items I have been so lucky to have been gifted by her.

I am not kidding when I say this little blog of mine is a lifesaver.  There are times, honestly, when it can be a bit of a chore.  Right now I have giveaway winners backed up, Etsy orders to complete, and my anxiety and depression has been FULL THROTTLE.  My mom suggested I eat gluten-free for a while to see if it helps my stomach.  I suggest she stop screaming at me and ignoring me for the duration of Mothers' Day, and then perhaps my stomach will settle down.  Dunno, just a thought.

However, in the darkest days, especially the ones recently, there has been a light.  Either a tweet or email would come in, I'd get a little care package here and there...just a whisper saying, "we are here."  Thank you to those of you who helped me, you know who you are.   

I have a new great idea forming, a new and DIFFERENT way of looking at blogging, and I hope to really start getting it ready for this summer!

In other rad news, one of my BFFs Jess, over at MILKY ROBOT and I have both been zine crazy lately, both in purchasing and authorization.  Check back on our blogs to see the unveil of a lost art form that needs resurgence!  Also, I will be revealing some zines I LOVE right now, coming later this week in perhaps...wait for it....my first VLOG ever.





Thursday, May 9, 2013

Stranger Bird Vintage is Changing Lives


I just recently discovered a gold mine of radness.  I am constantly on the look out for Etsy shops geared towards plus-size vintage clientele, especially when they are operated by one of the neatest chicks in the world.  Stranger Bird Vintage is run by a Miss Jenny, who I immediately fell in love with, because she and I are both enamored by Morrissey, she's a librarian (HELLO DREAM JOB) as well as being an all around kick in the pants.  

Too often I come across "plus-size" vintage stores where the dresses are basically glorified mumus, and there's no measurements.  This shop is refined, the products are well-photographed, designed and measured.  

Jenny is also an awesome person.  As you all know, I have been feeling rather depressed and extremely low lately, so making new friends and knowing there are others out there, such as her, really helps me get through the day!

I just wanted to showcase a few things I love from her shop:





So what, I've got a bit of a khaki obsession going on ever since Moonrise Kingdom.  I absolutely adore this shop, its' owner, and the fact that this morning I think she commented on every single post I've written!  What a gal!


Tuesday, May 7, 2013

The Time I Took Mushrooms Before School


My boyfriend in high school was a complete and total mess.  He was hilarious, debonair, charming, and had an amazing gap in his teeth.  I first spotted him eating lunch with another girl, segregating themselves from the rest of the school population.  They were both older than I was, merely by a year, but I looked up to them like they were gods.  I even referred to them as "Beth and Eddie", an homage to my favorite alternative band couple at the time, Eddie Vedder and Beth Liebling.

Somehow, someway, we became friends.  I was closer with "Beth" at first, she became a regular fixture at my house during weekends.  All I can remember is one time she accidentally spilled syrup on my parents' kitchen floor, and that was the end of her coming over.  She also drove a truck that ran on propane instead of gas, and had a sister whose boyfriend was about as gay as they came.  I wasn't sure whether or not I should I should say something to her sister...but the fact that the guy had blue contacts and didn't care for having sex with her, might have been a couple of hints she had missed.

Regardless, Beth was still hung up on Eddie, after their "tragic" breakup.  She would drag me with her to hear his band practice: Peal.  Peal was a blend of Weezer, Superdrag and my slowly melting high school panties.  I became a regular fixture during rehearsals, and eventually Cara moved onto the drummer.  Since they (Beth and Eddie) had since long been broken up, and she often joked that we would make a cute couple.  I could not help but agree.

Eventually, we started to date.  We were a match made in heaven because neither one of us seemed to care about anything.  I was such a good student, and he such a charmer, we were able to just wander about school, or just take off and do our own thing.  Any of my "unexcused" absences were promptly taken care of by my French teacher, Mrs. Arino.  She knew the way my mother treated me, and she did not want to see me in trouble.  She was the best kind of human being and TRULY cared about me.  If only she knew what I was doing in my free time.

So Eddie decided that one day on the way to school, zooming the streets of Rocklin in his Mazda 323, that we needed to split a bag of mushrooms that he had bought from a friend.  Eddie had introduced me to every drug I ever tried: from pot to heroin, and because I am such a dumb ass I tried them all.  I highly recommend trying most drugs once, but any form of hallucinogen is just not right for me.

I have a lot of let's say...issues.  I like to keep these issues in a place in my brain that is never accessed, and usually will take a viewing of The Joy Luck Club or No Country for Old Men to get some of this crap out of me.  Instead of talking about things, I like to bottle them up inside (super healthy, I know) and then slip into a rage a-la Good Will Hunting, with Baker Street blaring in the background, beating the holy hell out of someone, or perhaps just harming myself!  Needless, to say. magnifying your feelings, the way mushrooms do, is probably not the best idea for someone like me.

SO HELL YEAH I'LL TAKE THEM BEFORE SCHOOL!  I had no idea what I was in for, but if Eddie wanted me to do it, I was in.  I chewed them, and almost spewed several times before I had the breath of a dinosaur, and the mindset of a paranoid chihuahua.  We went our separate ways for classes, and I was pretty much laughing at these "mushrooms", since nothing seemed to be happening to me at all.

My first class was Dance II, so I waltzed right into the cafeteria and took my usual seat.  Today we would be working on a Carmen Miranda number.  As soon as my teacher said "FRUIT" I was tripping balls.  She started talking about a fruit basket headpiece, and I could not stop cracking up.  My good friend Joe was staring at me, probably because I looked like an idiot.  When Mrs. G started showing us steps, I realized quickly that I would not make it through this school day.  I grabbed my bag, and I shimmied my way right the hell out of there.

You have to understand, no one thought I could do any wrong in school, so I could slip rather nonchalantly in and out of classes, be they mine or someone else's, rather easily.  I got straight As and barely went to school.  My teachers knew I was beyond it all.  I felt privileged and cursed at the same time. 

So it really starts to get intense as I approach the Music Building to find Eddie.  This became a personal quest for me, since he was my only ticket out of there.  I was not surprised to find him outside either, pupils as big as saucers, and sweating profusely.  Simultaneously we said, "We gotta go." 

I think it was the rather confident way we strolled towards the 323, started that bitch, and slowly drove away.  We were not as "guarded" as schools are now, although our Security Guard waved us out.  Pretty fucking bizarre, but then again, maybe it was just a tree with a polo shirt on and a walkie-talkie, who knows?

As we drove away, we both turned around and noticed our friend Brooke was in the backseat.  Neither of us remember inviting her, her joining us, or even having seen her.  She scared the SHIT out of me, and both Eddie and I jumped.

"What the hell are you doing here?"  We asked, in unison. 

"Let's go to Auburn!" was her reply.  Okay, that makes sense, let's go.  So we drove to Auburn, spent the better part of the day staring at leaves and drinking white mochas (it was the nineties, lay off), and then, of course...I had to go home.

I had to be home at the "usual" time, or the cops (a.k.a parents) would put out an APB for me and perhaps another six months of being grounded would be added to my already growing sentence.  Good thing was, my Dad wanted me to vacuum.

So I ran the vacuum over the same spot about twenty times.  The he asked if something was wrong.  I tried to snap out of it, and started to laugh.  He just rolled his eyes.

I spent the greater part of that evening looking at my comforter, which was painstakingly sewn, it seemed, from hundreds of lizards.  Also, the "cottage cheese" ceiling, as they say, was dripping that sweet goodness down my walls all night.  I don't think I closed my eyes once, and if I did, all I could see were Spirograph style images taking over my brain.  Eddie must have called me sixty times to tell me various fascinating stories about watermelon, and the water cycle and so on...

I vowed I would never do them again, as soon as I felt like a human being again the next day.  I think it was about a week before I was snacking on them again, this time with Eddie behind the wheel, calling me someone else's name (a girl I was always jealous of, so it REALLY pissed me off), parked in a Park and Ride, with me crying and telling him I was going to choke him with a straw.

Don't do drugs kids.




Monday, May 6, 2013

The Best Friends a Girl Can Have


So, for those of you who know me personally, you know that recently (probably within the last five years), that I have had some major falling outs with my "best friends".  One friend from college has decided not to speak to me because I could not help her with her resume.  Or rather, according to her, "just won't make time to do it."  Hi, you're 27, make a resume.  Be an adult.  This is the same "friend" who blamed me for the loss of her virginity, because she slept with one of my friends from high school (was I there putting a gun to your head....NO) and he decided she was too much to handle as a girlfriend.  It was also my fault that I did not listen to my other friends, who couldn't understand why I would tolerate being treated like crap by her.  I'll admit, it was hard for me to watch her get brand new cars, checks from home and support from her family at what seemed like an unconditional rate.  I tried getting her a job, she hated it.  I think because it was actual work, not just sitting at home crying over Top Gun.  I have reached out to her several times, but apparently being a Brooklyn Hipster is much more important.  Congratulations, you live in New York City, you look really cool...wait, no one cares.  I bet your parents love supporting you into your thirties. 

My other "best friend" and I had a huge falling out this year, when I my anxiety got completely out of control, and I was experiencing some extreme agoraphobia.  Of course her "wedding" was coming up, so it had to be all about her.  I came up with a rad idea for a bridal shower, she informed me we would not be taking the Haunted Hollywood tour (as I had suggested and planned) but that it was to be referred to as a "bachelorette party" and god forbid NOT a bridal shower.  Um, okay.  Then she told me that she wanted to have a SLEEPOVER at "her house".  First of all, I am too fucking old to sleep over anywhere but in my own bed.  Secondly, there are eight other people living in "your house" and I would rather die than be around most of them.  Finally, a sleepover?  Are we ten years old?  I happily obliged the change, but when I was having trouble getting the invitations out because I was so depressed, she decided to inform me, through text messaging, that I was "just being selfish and lying...you don't have anxiety, you're just lazy..."  This is someone whom I have watched cheat on her boyfriend, steal guys away from me, copied just about everything that I do, taken advantage of me at every turn, and gave her boyfriend and ultimatum in terms of their wedding.  Either he would propose by New Year, or she would be out.  Good work, guys love ultimatums, especially when it effects the rest of your life.  Good luck finding any pot, since that was the only reason you ever called me anyway.  Also, you're welcome for the DAYS I took off of work, so you could get your cosmetology licence.  My text back to her was simple, "Have fun at your wedding, I won't be there."

Where am I going with all this?  Well, I have finally achieved the impossible.  I have friends who care about me!  And all because of this magical blog.  I was rather absent from blogging this past week, basically because sometimes I am a bad blogger...I don't pre-write my posts (my goal for next month is to at least have them planned) because I love the spontaneity of writing something fresh and new.  I also have been working double shifts, training new hires and then serving or bartending afterwards, which is hard work, and definitely a blog post for later.  Most importantly, I was just having a bummer of a week.  If you read my blog regularly, you'll know I was also being bullied AGAIN by one of my elementary school mates, who had already spent five years bullying me in the first place.  Then her ass of a husband decided to comment on my blog, and that really harshed my mellow.

So, almost by magic, just as I am sitting here now, a slew of comments, texts, Facebook comments, IG tags and messages started coming in.  "Are you okay?"  "Keep your head up!"  "You're a great girl!"  "I wondered where you had been..."  Oh my goodness, I could not believe it.  The support, the love that was thrown my way, not just in this instance, but ever since I started this blog, has been overwhelming. 

I wanted to start off this week fresh, not holding on to any of the bullshit that has been keeping me down, and really focus on what matters most.  I have to personally acknowledge a few people, because without them, I would not have made it.

Rebel: I know your moving right now and incredibly busy, but I love you and I know you are always there for me! 

Jess: I know what it's like to lose a member of your family, but you have gained another sweet baby and I am so happy for you.  You are one hell of a lady, so talented and always encouraging to me.  It means the world!

Charissa: Your existence alone, the motivation from your words...you are a poet.

Amber: Thank you for coming into my life, standing up for me and being so awesome.

Jennifer, Autumn, Bethany, Karen, Denise, Carly, Jess: My sidebar and Instagram has become like a rad locker door from Saved by the Bell.  I open my email and all I see are messages from you guys, positive thoughts, pictures of sloths (you know what I like) and endless love.  I could not make it without you.  

Jenny: Where the hell have you been all my life?  I can't wait to team up and take over the world, of course with a Smiths' track playing in the background.  

I am sure I am forgetting some people, I must thank my "real life" pals such as Desi, Tracy and Melissa, for always being there for me, especially at work, where my stress level really hits an all-time high.  Also, I can not forget my boo, John.  Thanks for putting up with my crap babe.  It doesn't matter that you hate Carmelo Anthony, or skateboarding or Fall Out Boy.  I LOVE YOU.

If you are expecting a package from me, it will be shipping today if it did not ship on Saturday.  Also, Brandi, if you're reading this, I am working diligently on your infinity cowl!  I got a little sidetracked by the fact that the GIANTS SWEPT THE DODGERS this week!  GO GIANTS!
 
That was the universe telling me to buck up, start laughing and stop being bummed!  Matt Cain, if you're reading this (which I am sure you are not) can you please start pitching like I know you can?  Thanks.  Also, can you have Brian Wilson call me?  Like, now.



 
  


Wednesday, May 1, 2013

Where the HELL HAVE YOU BEEN?

Sorry kids, I have been having some issues lately, both at home, work, and with my blog.  You see, I was threatened in a comment placed here on my blog, by the husband of a young lady who bullied me in elementary school.  He threatened me with a lawsuit if I did not take down my post about her, apparently using her real name had really upset these people.  Well, guess what?  That happened twenty years ago, and you SHOULD have apologized to me, instead of threatening me with a lawsuit.  Here's the genius comment I got:

Well, clever people. (name removed) married an attorney so stand by for a massive claim for defamation of character based on this false and outrageous posting. We have copies, so a delete makes no difference to the claim. But if you don't delete this posting Alison within 24 hours, we will claim punitive damages. 
 
First of all, the "claim" for defamation of character is going to be extremely hard to prove.  Calling someone a bitch on the Internet is not considered "defamation of character".  If I had said she had herpes, or stole from her job, then we might have a problem.  I told a story about what happened to me as a child, and your reaction is to call it "false and outrageous"?  How do you intend to prove it is false?  Are you going to go back to the nineties records at the YMCA and interview all the kids there to see if they remember the incident at the pool?  Good luck.  One of the counselors was also a child molester, so good luck getting through all that red tape to attain any material to support your "claim."
It is outrageous, you're right.  It's outrageous that one human being could treat another that way, and be so cold and unfeeling, especially at the age of ten.  It is also outrageous that you decided the best way to communicate about this would be to leave a comment on my blog, instead of emailing me directly.  See that huge button up there that says CONTACT?  Maybe attorneys can't read.  
See, here's the deal.  Bullies never change, they find other bullies and marry them.  I have changed the post, eliminating her real name, but I am never taking it down.  I am glad you have copies, that way you can show your friends what kind of a person you are, and perhaps maybe your children will be proud of you too.  
It's okay, what you feel is shame and embarrassment due to the fact that twenty years later, I still remember this, it still hurts, and I am telling people about it.  Also, my name is spelled A-L-L-I-S-O-N.  See there?  It's in the name of my blog.


 

Tuesday, April 23, 2013

Muffalo Mild Things

Well we all know I work in a restaurant bar and have for quite some time.  One day a couple of weeks ago, I decided I had had enough of working at this restaurant, and heard through the grape vine that another place, about fifty yards away, was hiring.  I had never entered this establishment, which is a little surprising, consider my baseball obsession and my love of football.  I had heard the service was atrocious, and it was pretty much the go-to place to get hammered, because apparently the idea of third party liability is not an issue for them. 

For those of you non-restaurant people, "third party liability" is a LAW that states that if you serve someone alcohol at your establishment, and subsequently said patron leaves, intoxicated or not, and let's say...gets a DUI, or assaults someone, the restaurant or bar can be held accountable for that person's behavior.  This is a concept that should be ingrained in any server or bartender's memory, because it could mean major trouble and major unemployment.

Moving on, I flashbacked to the days when I used to work at a real "bar", one dangerously close to the Anaheim Angels stadium (barf), the Orange County Convention Center, and the Honda Center, home of the Anaheim Ducks.  Needless to say, it was a shit show.  People would either come in hammered post-game, get hammered pre-game, or skip moving their bodies all together and just watch it on the big screen.  We had actual FIGHTS with broken glass everywhere, ass-grabbing and inappropriate comments all over the place, as well as the fact that I would usually get off around  four am.  Oh yeah, that and the fact that EVERYONE drank WHILE THEY WORKED including our General Manager.  I remember one night, handing her my checkout and monies, and she was too shit-faced to even read my paperwork.

Needless to say, I did not want to go back to that environment.  The money was great but the degrading nature of the work made me feel gross.  I decided I would go and apply over at Muffalo Mild Things, hoping it would be different than the sports bar experience I had had before.  Upon arrival, before my application was even complete, I was hired.  The assistant manager brought out the general manager, and they both drooled over me.  I wasn't even really trying to "perform" I just was honest with them: I like to take care of my guests, I have a ton of regulars and I have a hard time with people who don't like to work as a team.  They looked like I had just taken all of my clothes off and dry humped one of the many video games that surrounded us.

When the day came for my orientation, the assistant manager asked me to be there at eight am, with proper documentation.  I did as such.  I have NEVER had an experience like the one I was about to have. 

The assistant manager, whom we will refer to as Tara, started to scream at the computer, "Fuck!  I hate this fucking thing."  I am no prude, and if you are a regular reader of my blog you know I love profanity as much as George Carlin, however, we're in an orientation here?!  All I could hear or think about was my boss at my other job, how she would have probably bled through the eyes if she saw the way this girl was leading this "orientation".

After she was done swearing at the computer, she took us into the "main dining room" which, due to the nature of my job, I began looking all around, noticing tiny details.  The place was FILTHY.  Fingerprints on every surface, sticky stuff on booths, and it looked like the place had never been vacuumed.  I figured the restaurant wasn't opening for another two hours, so maybe someone would be coming through to clean it up.  The phone kept ringing and ringing, and no one seemed to care to answer.  I was a little scared and also, mildly thrilled because I had lived under the thumb of so many rules and regulations for so long, that maybe this DGAF attitude is just what I need.

The funny thing was, there was no one there.  I'm used to walking into my work and seeing at least four cooks opening up the kitchen, and our managers get there bright and early.  I saw one prep chef, then another came when I was about to leave.  There was no one setting the restaurant up, no one cleaning, just a really loud bumping of gangsta rap coming from the kitchen.  Tara sat us down, myself and the other young lady, who was "lucky" enough to be a transfer from another Muffalo.  She rushed us through the whole employee handbook, and actually hassled me when I was attempting to read the material and stated, "Just take the quiz, the answers are right here."

That was the part when I knew something was not going to jive with me working here.  It was just a lingering thought in the back of my mind, as I left, but I tried to emphasize to myself how unhappy I was working in such a constrained environment, feeling unappreciated.  Maybe the lax nature of this place would be the answer to all the things that were annoying me at the time.  You know, important stuff like being able to wear ANY NAIL COLOR, no tattoo limitations or "tattoo-free" areas, and of course the most important thing, being able to wear whatever plugs I want. 

Now that I read the above, I can't help but laugh at how trivial that all is.  It certainly would not be worth leaving my current job, my current awesome regular clientele, and the fact that I already know what I'm doing.  I lasted all of ten minutes on my first training shift, basically I showed up, told my trainer I would not be returning, that I would come back and bring my uniforms ASAP, and be sure I spoke with Tara or the GM, and thank them for the opportunity.  He looked at me like I just went to the bathroom all over the floor.

"Fine, go back to your empty restaurant," he told me.  I just walked away.

The next day, I called first thing in the morning, and asked to speak to a manager.  The young lady told me there was no manager on duty at the current moment, and did I want to leave a message?  Oh yes, I thought, I'd love to leave a message, but not one that you would feel comfortable writing down, sweetheart.  I told her who I was, that I was in training and would not be returning, and if someone could call me and tell me when and whom to surrender my uniforms to, that would be great.

I NEVER got a phone call from them, either way.  If they had not gotten the message, then they must have noticed I did not show for my training shift, so why weren't they calling me?  I had given notice at my other job, and was now making sure I could rescind that immediately, wondering why no one was contacting me from Muffalo Mild Things. I decided it was no biggie, I had done my due diligence and was now going happily back to where I belong. Boy, was I in for a shocker.

On Saturday morning a couple days later, John was driving me to work when we noticed an older Honda Civic pulling up next to us at one light, and then following us quickly through the main streets until we met again, at a red light.  The owner of the car stared at me and then rolled down her window, ripping her sunglasses off her face.  She screamed at me, "WHAT THE FUCK!!!  WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR PROBLEM?"  I looked at John.  Had we cut her off?  Is this bitch nuts?  Then she said, as the light turned green, "IT'S ME, TARA! HELLO?  WHAT THE FUCK?" 

It was then I realized what was going on.  She had seen me in the car and was trying to catch up to us.  Then that crazy bitch decided to scream profanities at me through her window.  Thank goodness the light turned green, because we both had to go in different directions.  John asked me, "Who the hell was that?"  My response blew his mind.

I said, "That's the assistant manager from Muffalo."  I was in complete shock as I finished my ride to work, and thought on the experience throughout my entire shift.  I started to think, did she not get my message?  Why didn't she call me?  Is she going to jump me in the parking lot?  Our restaurants are a mere fifty yards away, is she going to send her chicken wing posse over here to hassle me?

So I did something I normally would never do, I called corporate headquarters and explained the incident, how it had made me feel, and how I felt completely threatened by this girl, and was appalled at her nonprofessional behavior both inside and outside of her restaurant.  They were very interested and also embarrassed, and apologized profusely to me.  They assured me I did not have to return the uniforms, and that they would be sending me a check for a full days pay (wow---is that my hush money?) and that they would be in contact with Tara and her bosses.

I had a couple of conversations with MMT's HR department, and was helped by an especially kind woman, whom made me feel as comfortable as I could about the whole thing.  The saga did not end, however. 

A few days later,  I got a phone call from a strange number, and like anyone else would do, I sent that bitch straight to voice-mail.  Guess who it was?  Tara's boss, the general manager I had met for all of five minutes before the drooling stopped and the hiring began.  She left me the coldest, most condescending voice-mail I have ever heard.  She suggested we have a "chit-chat" (I HATE THAT TERM) about what happened, and that I had not filled out my paperwork correctly, so she needed my social security number, in order to "get you this special check by Friday."  I thought about calling her back and giving her the business, but I decided against it.

What struck me as odd was that she was calling from her CELL PHONE and also that she needed my social.  I watched Miss "Fuck You" approve my I-9 right on the computer, and that cannot occur without a social security number.  I immediately called HQ and HR again, explained what was going on, and informed them I would not be answering or taking any calls from anyone associated with that restaurant, especially giving my social security number to some bitch on her cell phone.  They agreed, and assured me I would not be contacted by anyone at the restaurant again.

Can you believe this shit???

Ahhhhhhh, I never thought I would say this, and certainly not with all that's been going on with my job, life, etc...but I am glad I work where I work.  I'm proud of what I do.  I'm beautiful both inside and out, and I have a ton of awesome guests I consider my friends now.  Some of them are probably reading this right now, so thanks guys.  And, don't worry, I'm not going to leave you, ever, ever again.


Monday, April 22, 2013

New On My Sidebar...Meet Amber from My Three Bittles!


Where are you from? Where do you live?

I'm from Tennessee but we're living in Georgia for now. 

What do you blog about?

Arg. I always despise this question. 
I blog about everything. I know, such an awesome answer, huh?!
I blog about my life, my kids, my tattoos, my husband, our dogs, our cats, military life, day to day life, etc etc etc. 
I blog recipes and tutorials. 
I share things that I love with the world-and by world I mean whoever reads my blog. 

What are some of your hobbies or interests outside of the blogosphere? 

Hmm. I'm a stay at home mom. I haven't really met many people here yet, but when I do have local friends I love to go thrift shopping, get pedicures, go out for coffee, have playdates and overall just have adult conversation--wow, I'm such a mom. 



I'm Amber. I'm 27. I'm a mom of three. 
Fin's 5.
Maddie's 4.
Owen's 1. 
David's the husband. 
We have two cats, a puppy and an America bulldog. 
Our house is a crazy house like 85% of the time. 
I wouldn't have it any other way. 
Don't tell my husband I said that because I constantly tell him that I can't stand his stupid dog. (The 100+ pound American bulldog, Bo)
I have tattoos. I have my septum pierced. I've had many other piercings but they've gone away with time. 
I love to read but rarely have time. 
I don't want to work. I have no desire to get a boring job. I love being a stay at home mom but I know that when they're all in school I'll end up getting some sort of job just to pass time. 
I have a big heart. I attempt to be nice to everybody.
I don't like rude people. 
Honestly I think I'm pretty boring/normal but the weird looks I get when people see David & I out and about with our kids say we're not. (I never understood those looks) (He's heavily tattooed and used to have big gauged ears).
Umm... I think I'm going to stop rambling there because I just don't know what else to say.

I LOVE Amber's blog, and it is always evolving...she is exactly like me, neither of us are really sure what "genre" of blogger we fall into, nor do I think we need to decide.  Please go visit her lovely blog My Three Bittles.  The best kind of bloggers, in my opinion, are open and honest.  I think you will find she is both!