Since You've Been Gone

This is how I feel when blogging.

I took a small "blogging hiatus" this week to determine what the hell I am doing here.  I admit I was a bit naive when I began all this, I wasn't aware of the politics or the procedure.  I wanted to have fun, and somewhere along the way, I stopped having fun.

Suddenly, my every move was being criticized.  People that I befriended because of the blog ended up hating me because of it.  I just thought if you told the truth, people would get behind that.  I thought that since this was my space and my life, I could be in control of that.  I thought that some folks cared, when in the end they did everything they could to hurt me.  I couldn't believe or deal with all the drama anymore.  All I could see was red, I could not understand the concept of bullying or belittling people, as we are adults...or so I thought.  It felt like high school all over again.  I did not want to look at the internet, I did not want to hear the word "blog."

Today I opened up my laptop and the first thing I saw was exactly what I needed to see.  It was a very simple post, an outfit post in fact, that made me want to cry.  I'm not sure why I got so emotional, but I just took one look and thought, "EXACTLY."  The way this beautiful woman was handling her "haters" was so smart, so...much more effective and appropriate, I put away all the rage I had for hipster lying junkies and hick bitches.  I was so inspired, I could not help but identify with these words and pictures.  I realized my stagnation was my own doing, not that of my tormentors.

It's no secret I am a huge fan of Rachele of The Nearsighted Owl, and I read her blog every day without fail.  I am currently in the process of her e-course, How to Be a Fat Bitch and it might sound a little Susan Powter-ish but I am telling you, it is changing my life.  Whenever I am feeling down and out, I end up somehow feeling affirmed after reading or seeing her, mainly because Rachele's beauty and intelligence is catching and full of warm, fuzzy, fat hugs.  She tells it like it is, plain and simple.  She looks those who mock her straight in the eye and hands it right back to them, in the most witty and intelligent way possible.

What a freaking doll.

What she is doing on her blog has much more impact than another outfit shoot with another giveaway and another Rafflecopter headache.  She is educating people on a mass scale.  I am learning to look at my world in an entirely new way, breaking through limitations I placed on myself, and attempting to live my life without caring what ANYONE thinks.

More of Rachele's wisdom, and exactly what I needed this week...thank you girl.

 It is entirely thanks to her, my Brin and my Autumn that I am going to continue this journey with y'all.  (And I'm talking to you, my five readers!)